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Faux-Greek columns rise like they’re holding up the heavens; murals swirl across the ceiling in the color palette of a piña colada; the lighting is the same warm gold as melted butter.

One of the standouts is a riff on the piña colada called “To the Moon,” with a not-of-this-planet look that comes by way of a bright purple butterfly pea flower extract and a dusting of cocktail glitter.

Or are they simply there to make plain old water taste like a piña colada?

“The kids are like, ‘We want a virgin mojito or a virgin piña colada, and the next thing you know I am paying $18 for each,” he said.

I went on a first date, where I ordered a virgin piña colada.